i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
