More tranny stories later!
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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