singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
