If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
