Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
