Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(612): View more from Minnesota

I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.

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(612): I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius. http://tfl.nu/9tta

Replies (39) Good night (4086) Bad night (908)
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(435): View more from Utah

it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.

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(435): it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush. http://tfl.nu/c95w

Replies (36) Good night (1359) Bad night (5331)
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(678): View more from Georgia

He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.

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(678): He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again. http://tfl.nu/ehlu

Replies (20) Good night (6140) Bad night (885)
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(210): View more from Texas

I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on

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(210): I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on http://tfl.nu/6saa

Replies (10) Good night (984) Bad night (3371)
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(630): View more from Illinois

He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.

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(630): He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick. http://tfl.nu/e6nk

Replies (29) Good night (1186) Bad night (5982)
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.

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(412): yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical. http://tfl.nu/syar

Replies (27) Good night (1219) Bad night (649)
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(262): View more from Wisconsin

Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay

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(262): Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay http://tfl.nu/pdwa

Replies (5) Good night (888) Bad night (1917)
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine

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(412): I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine http://tfl.nu/2gdt

Replies (13) Good night (871) Bad night (1814)
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(+64): View more from New Zealand

Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.

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(+64): Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please. http://tfl.nu/o748

Replies (8) Good night (1000) Bad night (458)
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(208): View more from Idaho

It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it

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(208): It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it http://tfl.nu/8smb

Replies (5) Good night (1310) Bad night (470)
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(651): View more from Minnesota

His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.

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(651): His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve. http://tfl.nu/5nws

Replies (5) Good night (736) Bad night (448)
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(757): View more from Virginia

So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night

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(757): So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night http://tfl.nu/a36m

Replies (4) Good night (771) Bad night (567)
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(318): View more from Louisiana

My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter

(504): View more from Louisiana

Is this a considering it or regretting it text?

(318): View more from Louisiana

I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.

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(318): My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter (504): Is this a considering it or regretting it text? (318): I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me. http://tfl.nu/wpzn

Replies (3) Good night (436) Bad night (921)
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(505): View more from New Mexico

I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....

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(505): I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from.... http://tfl.nu/owld

Replies (2) Good night (673) Bad night (237)
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(513): View more from Ohio

He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.

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(513): He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog. http://tfl.nu/uit4

Replies (4) Good night (236) Bad night (618)

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