Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  I'm eating all of the evidence.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): I'm eating all of the evidence. http://tfl.nu/m4yn
  Replies (12) Good night (2183) Bad night (556)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (412): Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it! http://tfl.nu/we6e
  Replies (24) Good night (4200) Bad night (929)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (215): My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.." http://tfl.nu/yyzh
  Replies (124) Good night (41305) Bad night (2830)
• Favorite

  (423): View more from Tennessee

  i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (423): i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions. http://tfl.nu/w3io
  Replies (17) Good night (1182) Bad night (8102)
• Favorite

  (636): View more from Missouri

  No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (636): No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from. http://tfl.nu/d5gf
  Replies (4) Good night (1005) Bad night (2972)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (908): You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams. http://tfl.nu/yznu
  Replies (23) Good night (3753) Bad night (1176)
• Favorite

  (909): View more from California

  Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (909): Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out. http://tfl.nu/vj9i
  Replies (10) Good night (1987) Bad night (757)
• Favorite

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (918): I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this http://tfl.nu/kupi
  Replies (6) Good night (1740) Bad night (724)
• Favorite

  (858): View more from California

  currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (858): currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh http://tfl.nu/1197
  Replies (6) Good night (1600) Bad night (683)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (609): She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her. http://tfl.nu/z51y
  Replies (19) Good night (2988) Bad night (974)
• Favorite

  (479): View more from Arkansas

  I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (479): I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober. http://tfl.nu/132v
  Replies (4) Good night (1513) Bad night (642)
• Favorite

  (626): View more from California

  So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (626): So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential. http://tfl.nu/3n2i
  Replies (5) Good night (2689) Bad night (582)
• Favorite

  (561): View more from Florida

  Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?

  (1-561): View more from Florida

  Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (561): Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache? (1-561): Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night. http://tfl.nu/sa3s
  Replies (2) Good night (672) Bad night (251)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (612): He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this. http://tfl.nu/vp0n
  Replies (10) Good night (2877) Bad night (391)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (513): Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team. http://tfl.nu/xqxm
  Replies (10) Good night (446) Bad night (271)

Randomize