How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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