his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
why is half of my head shaved?
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