I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
