Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.