One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
