Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
