Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
