as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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