What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
