we're blogging at a bar
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
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