i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
