I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
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