these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
