i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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