Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Randomize
