come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize