I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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