On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
