thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Life is so much better after having sex.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Is her dick bigger than yours?
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize
