when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
