Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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