I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?