no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
I will be naked everywhere
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
