Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
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they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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