I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Randomize
