Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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