On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize
