...so i touched it.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Randomize