the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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