ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
