no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Randomize
