she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
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the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
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Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
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