I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
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