On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
its not stalking. its research.
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
Randomize