At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
