So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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