I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
