my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
