Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(714): View more from California

First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?

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(909): View more from California

I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him

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(201): View more from New Jersey

the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

it was like getting a handjob from robocop

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Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
Read it at the TFLN blog
(416): View more from Toronto

you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.

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(303): View more from Colorado

Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.

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(773): View more from Illinois

she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep

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(+34): View more from Spain

Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?

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(207): View more from Maine

Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!

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