No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
