no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
