Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
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I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
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