I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Randomize
