Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Fuck appropriateness.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
