I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
Randomize
